Good morning, dearly beloved We are gathered here today To watch two we know make a big mistake They'll stand up at the alter solemnly swear i do They'll be together forever 'til they find somebody new
Her daddy's in the front row Muttering oh no here we go again They had a couple dates Now she's months late it's twenty buck a plate i spent, oh:
Good morning, dearly beloved I'd like to welcome ya'll To see the side-effects of sex and alcohol Please bow your heads and join me In a prayer for two Who'll be together forever 'til they somebody new
The bride is a flirt and the groom is worse As he's putting the ring on her He's checking the bridesmaids Thinking that he might take The maid of honor's honor, oh:
Welcome, dearly beloved We are here this afternoon throw rice as these two Drive down the road to ruin With cans tied to the bumper And a dragging muffler too be together forever Until they find somebody new
So raise your glass and join me Here's to the bride and They'll be together forever 'til they find somebody new